Hotel chocolate A slab of wank
Part of this blog is going to be a review section on films,food,cars,restaurants,pubs, road side cafes and anything I encounter that I feel may be worth giving my opinion on so I'm going to start with some chocolate my mom brought me from her trip to London with my niece for her birthday.
So we have 3 types of chocolate from 'hotel chocolate' I remember when someone first mentioned it to me and this school boy part of me imagined a 'hansel and gretel' style hotel made from chocolate but that dream was shattered when I entered the shop which was like an unhappy Cadburys shop with highly enflated prices and random chocolate products, although I won't take it away from them the chocolate its self is up there with some of the best.
The chocolate
1 dark fruit and nut slab : granted I only had a very small bar but when I think of fruit and nut I imagine lots of different fruits maybe a few varieties of nuts but this was literally 2 hazelnuts and two very yellow raisins, you get a very shit score for effort and originality as it's about as exciting as clymidia
2 cognac balls : well they definitely delivered on flavour and packed a punch I mean it's the sort of thing you say 'fuck me that's strong' after having one but I will say the combination of alcohol and chocolate is perfect just a little too strong for my tastes also I am not a cognac drinker (my mom brought me then because she said it will help clear cold but she is fucking nuts so I don't take her advice on a lot of things lol) although I can breath a little better so maybe they worked
3 salted caramel slab : it had the better overall taste of the 3 but the butter was very noticeable in the caramel and left an oily taste and feeling in my mouth that after a while needed a cognac to clear, so overall it was an ok chocolate needed more salt but manageable.
So hotel chocolate has been massive disappointment and whoever designed the packaging of the mini slabs need a cock punch as they are so hard to get into, if this was a present for my nan she would be fucked
The chocolate
1 dark fruit and nut slab : granted I only had a very small bar but when I think of fruit and nut I imagine lots of different fruits maybe a few varieties of nuts but this was literally 2 hazelnuts and two very yellow raisins, you get a very shit score for effort and originality as it's about as exciting as clymidia
2 cognac balls : well they definitely delivered on flavour and packed a punch I mean it's the sort of thing you say 'fuck me that's strong' after having one but I will say the combination of alcohol and chocolate is perfect just a little too strong for my tastes also I am not a cognac drinker (my mom brought me then because she said it will help clear cold but she is fucking nuts so I don't take her advice on a lot of things lol) although I can breath a little better so maybe they worked
3 salted caramel slab : it had the better overall taste of the 3 but the butter was very noticeable in the caramel and left an oily taste and feeling in my mouth that after a while needed a cognac to clear, so overall it was an ok chocolate needed more salt but manageable.
So hotel chocolate has been massive disappointment and whoever designed the packaging of the mini slabs need a cock punch as they are so hard to get into, if this was a present for my nan she would be fucked
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